The Ludmila Confessions

Everything that was important in my life—my dreams and ambitions and hopes- were swept away by a wave of alcohol and drugs that took me from the height to the depths in a few lost years in Hollywood.  While reading my story, you will travel across those peaks and valleys, and perhaps experience the same […]

 I am a Russian and a Cossack by birth, a Venezuelan by exile, an American by choice, and a Mexican by fate. I was born in Russia in 1939, when World War 2 was brewing, AA was in its nascence, and the world was changing as it always will.  My family lived in a small village in […]

My earliest memories are of my family’s wartime home in White Russia, where the Cossacks had thrived for centuries in the fertile black earth steppe of the Kuban river region, beyond the valley of the Dnieper. I am a Cossack by birth and by temperament- a Cossack like the first cavalrymen, freebooters and petty nobles […]

As we left Sarakin or Krasnadon near the Caspian Sea at midnight in a  snowstorm, my mother told me I was dancing and singing with excitement, like I knew everything would be O.K.  My grandmother blessed us one by one and gave us salt bread and an Icon of our Savior, and on our way […]

Although I came into the world looking like a black, furry monkey, I turned out to be a matylok–our Russian word for a butterfly or chrysalis. In time, a beautiful butterfly would emerge from that cocoon—but it would be years before I would finally have a chance to see myself in the mirror and start […]

We traveled at night to avoid the bombers and bandits. “Where are we going?” everyone would ask, but no one answered because no one knew for sure. I snuggled in the soft, warm down-feather pillows inside the wagon, but outside the wind was howling and the snow began falling harder. Our horses were stamping their […]

There was little time to take a break en route, usually only one or two hours, even on the overnight stops. We would stop in a bombed-out village, an abandoned farmhouse, in a field, or up in the mountains. Women en route would gossip, tell personal stories, and exchange useful information with each other. After […]

Since we didn’t have time for stops, we all had our duties to perform: Father drove the wagon and tended the team of horses,  Anatoly walked alongside to lead the third horse (one horse was always ‘resting’ and ready to be changed), Mama would prepare our food inside the wagon, and my sister sat on the […]

Days rolled into weeks, and weeks into months. Our wagon train eventually circled around and stopped in the city of Lienz, in north central Austria. All of the warring forces were shooting at us, even the partisans, who accused us of being allied with the Germans–but we were only for God and ourselves, running from […]

From the horror of the massacre to a relatively peaceful, wooded campsite high up in the mountains– miracle of miracles my family survived, through the strength and love of my mother and father who worked hard to save us all, including Micha (“Michael” in English), the refugee boy who joined our family after his own […]

An American refugee program based in Vienna was helping to relocate the suffering survivors of the war and escape from Russia.   I don’t remember how long we waited in the refugee camp, but eventually we were offered a couple of choices for relocation:  to the US or to Venezuela?  We had all heard that America […]

The skies were just starting to show the first rays of the brilliant morning sun; bright blue skies and puffy clouds hanging above our eager hearts. We were anxious to see this land of honey and money and exotic fruits and birds, all the things that we had heard about, and now we had arrived […]

The Andes Mountains are the cordillera that runs north to south down the spine of the western South American continent. The great Liberator Simon Bolivar famously said, as he crossed the snowy peaks on a white horse, “If God is against me, then I will defy God.” In Venezuela, which extends far south and west […]

“Enbotidos Los Andes” was the name of Fedor Ivanovich’s proud new enterprise; his very first company, a grand beginning in the New World. His meatpacking business was a complete operation from beginning to end, from birthing and animal husbandry to feeding and butchering, to selling direct to stores, shops, and families in the region. In […]

Once again we were on the go!  Every time we moved, we came to a new and different world, and I was already getting hooked on traveling– at least it was never boring! The Andes mountains were so beautiful- the air was fresh and cool, the skies bright blue, the mountain and hills brilliant green. […]

On the road again, like a band of gypsies! Our next home, Maracay, was a small colonial city with wide streets and lots of parks with statues of heroes of the revolution at the battle of Carabobo. We drove through the city, so clean and free compared to others, and traveled about twenty minutes down […]

The river on our land was like one from a familiar scene you sometimes see in the movies, with a tree leaning over the bank from which I used to swing from the branches and fall into the water. Since I was busy helping at home, I did not go to school, and my free […]

Somewhere back in Austria, I had heard a song that went “Oh my Augustin, everything is lost and gone.” Father started laughing when he heard me singing this song as we packed the big red truck with all our belongings at 2 in the morning, getting ready to go back to Caracas. We were leaving, […]

We ended up in the outskirts of Caracas, in a home of a family with whom we’d been friends since Austria, by the name of Isbarenko. There were two sisters and a brother; the old man and my father had a good time together drinking and singing, and the old man played the accordion. The […]

Life seemed so simple and peaceful back then; anyone who went through the war would say that. But everything in my life has had a short term from beginning to end. Now mama decided that was time for me to have a little education; she did not know I would read every magazine I put […]

  Ludmila, Vera and Galina on the beach of Porlamar   Walking to and from school there was a children’s park where I would stop at the playground and swing, higher and higher, wanting to reach the sky. I thought I could transport myself magically to Hollywood, just like in the movies where everything is […]

Sometimes we had movies at school, and I began to get ideas of love and romance. I especially remember a very famous Spanish actor, Jorge Mistral, who had a deep sexy voice and a build like Victor Mature. Years later I actually met him, and years after that I learned he had killed himself because […]

  Before our 6th grade graduation, we had a lovely Spiritual Exercise, except I was the only non Roman Catholic (I am Orthodox, not Roman church). After the service, Father Ignacio de Loyola gave us a beautiful talk and told us that if we had a problem, we should write it on a piece of […]

By 1954 ,  Anatoly been gone for over a year and mother was very worried about him.  We hadn’t heard from him since he left,  and our the  letters were coming back from the address he left us. So the two ladies, decided they were going to El Dorado to find their brother! One early […]

  Goodbye to the little girl and hello to the young Lady. We were going back to the capital with the truck driver Julian, until we reached a small dusty village where his family lived. When we arrived there, his wife told him he couldn’t leave because their daughter was  giving birth, not too far […]

  I arrived before 9:30 am at the door of the downtown office  building, in the elegant business part of Caracas, and went up the 8th floor penthouse. My senator’s office had just opened; after entering, I saw my own desk with 2 telephones, and in his office were another three phones, one of which […]

Walking home one evening from the house of the Cacique Maria Luisa Escobar, I stopped for an ice cream with an Italian friend, and in walks in Juan Carlos Blaky. My heart just fell to the floor at his feet. Juan Carlos was the same man in the elevator of the hotel at Porlamar years […]

  Now I was working with all these incredible people at Canal 5- Casica Maria Luisa, and especially the Show de Renni. His wife was Renne, his first daughter was Ronna, and the last one would have been Ranna expect that in Spanish that means “frook.” Being on the Show de Renni” was very good […]

I was working as a representative for the “House of Seagram’s” and promoting their products in all of Caracas’s most elegant restaurants, bars and private clubs including Country Clubs and Polo Clubs with those handsome Venezuelan, Argentinians and Chilean men. I ended up at Walter’s high class liquor store, doing a promotion for Seagrams. I […]

  After all the wartime struggle to protect us, feed us, and put a roof over our heads, my father seemed lost in the New World. No bombs were falling, no enemy was chasing us. He had been raised and trained to fight, but now his zest for life was gone and he was confronted […]

Well, father was gone. “If only!” The most powerful words in the dictionary and the smallest ones.  If only there had been AA at that time in Venezuela If only we had known how to cope with the signs of the alcoholism that was eating up my father. If only! But soon dear Maria Luisa […]

Now, in my solitude, while trying to live a life of redemption in the winter of my life, I am finally learning that there is within me an invincible summer. One night in the dressing room of the Canal 2 studio, the makeup lady was getting me ready for a live commercial where I was […]

This is how I became a high fashion model. My desire to savor life was like a flickering light that I may never see again: to feel satisfaction instead of anger, to laugh instead of crying, to be courageous instead of hiding, to face the world, to not fear anyone, and with a new curiosity […]

This is a story of soul and body, of sin and forgiveness. I had always thought that Maruza was interested in Horacio, but now that I saw her going out with Ilio, and them looking so romantic together, I felt much better going with Horacio on this moonlit walk, holding hands. He was from a […]

Just a few days later, we were in a hotel making love, when Walter started smoking something that didn’t smell like regular tobacco. He offered some to me, but I didn’t like it because it made me feel stupid and dull.  He just watched me with curiosity. Then he said, “This hotel is not for […]

Walter talked me into using a french dressmaker, couture style. She was very good and dressed me elegantly, with jackets and outfits appropriate for England, France, and Europe in general. These clothes were very ladylike, and I loved it. In other words, Walter groomed and dressed me in his own favorite style. In the meantime, […]

From London, we went on to Germany where Walter picked me up a Mercedes Benz that he had ordered. They delivered it to our hotel door in Frankfurt. It had a sunroof, four doors and was jet black. I never did care too much about cars so I didn’t know the price, nor did I […]

I kept going with my dream man, expecting a magic outburst of lightning, stars and ecstasy. Today, maybe I have an answer to my searching: I needed it, the touch, the contact, the feeling of love, the acknowledgement of my being– that love is what I have been chasing all my life. Lovers became my […]

Things were starting to look very black, or I should say red, in Venezuela. After Cuba, the people here also wanted a revolution. My great friend and lover from years back, General Marcos Perez Jimenez, now had to flee the country. Venezuela seemed to us like a haven after World War II, with food, and […]

Hello New York! I had been there twice already but landing at Laguardia airport was still exciting. To get to our new home at Syracuse we took the Greyhound bus. The air is different to me in New York, smelling of opportunity, success, money, and fame. I was thrilled to be on American soil with […]

Go to Hollywood! I took a Greyhound bus across the country to Hollywood all alone. Now life was taking on a different color. While passing through the states, seeing the open countryside, I could not keep my eyes away. I loved to see this vast country, all the people, state after state, across the continent. […]

Upon awakening my first day in Hollywood, I couldn’t see the sad environment I was in. I only had one thing on my mind, “I must see everything!” I first needed to get to know this city. So I put on some makeup and out the door I went! I walked and walked, until I […]

I had my very own apartment! I was astonished walking into this three bedroom place, with all the basic furniture, a refrigerator and stove. It was all I needed! I just had to call and tell mama and Gala the good news, where life had taken me! Here now, living in Hollywood, in Beverly Hills, […]

At the end of 1960, in Caracas, everything looked promising with Walter and I. We had wonderful times dancing, celebrating the holidays, and of course living it up with alcohol and cocaine. It all seemed so inoffensive back then. One night, before we went out to the Key Club, he told me he wanted to […]

As I am writing this story of my life, I have had to come face to face with myself. Of course, it is fifty years and a lifetime later. It took half a century to become who I finally was meant to be. How sad, you might say, but I know it is not sad […]

  Mind you, Wilshire Blvd is a very busy area around Beverly Hills, so I looked at the car and with a smile gave the keys back to the sales person. I said in my broken English, “Please just deliver this car to this address,” and handed them my home address. They didn’t ask if […]

In Caracas, once upon a time, I remember seeing a film with Marcello Mastroianni and Anita Ekberg called “La Dolce Vita.” Well, that movie exactly portrayed my life back then, even when I was working: In and out of love, a life of romance, sex, cocaine, alcohol, even orgies– just like the movie. It was […]

We headed to New York again for the big Fashion Week, staying in a luxury penthouse by the East River across from the United Nations Building– a gorgeous little apartment for my boss, Bud, and me. Although I adored New York, I still had a beautiful home, many friends, and my mother to go back […]

Daud, his brother and a group of us went out as usual to the Belly Dancers cabaret, and then to the Flamenco Cafe. That night there was a gypsy guitar player and a very famous dancer. I don’t remember their names, but at that time they were famous and even appeared in films. In the […]

Before the great New York blackout, I was working as a model for Oleg Cassini, a very famous designer of royal blood. He was the wardrobe designer for First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy, the wife of President J. F. Kennedy. Cassini hired me for a big show, but said before the show that was two days […]

My tremendous appetite for life took me to many places– wild adventures, romances, fantasies– places that most people only see in movies. I walked with a cane, smoked a pipe, rode a motorcycle. Later Bianca Jagger started doing this; of course she was very famous with a husband like Mick Jagger. As a model I […]

I am grateful for all the men in my life, and especially grateful for all the places they took me and the lessons that they taught me. To me they are worth solid gold and pure Fort Knox! My marriage with Jack was open, but I did not understand that completely. In any case, I […]

My husband Jack sent me to Monterrey, Mexico to collect the money that the men who bought our music business had neglected to pay us for a long time. Jack’s real business was selling music internationally through his company Music Industries. It was only a couple of thousand dollars; he sent me not only because […]

Some people will recognize this was the behavior of an alcoholic, and yes, that is true. However, I don’t blame any one person or event; yes, I was an alcoholic and I have been proudly sober for many years now. My life has changed completely, and I give all credit to my Creator whom I […]

At a party at Reni’s house, Jack and I met some people that were talking about holding the First World Festival in Caracas, called Onda Nueva. They suggested that we might like to help, especially since I was in show business, rubbing elbows with lots of stars and knew lots of interesting people. Jack decided […]

Reality truly is stranger, stronger and more exciting than any fiction, so just keep reading: this is a true story! To describe the fantastic gaiety, joy, and happiness of everyone invited to the Onda Nueva festival is almost impossible. The air was so thick with excitement and electrifying energy, especially from hearing all the new […]

Finally we came to the end of this fantastic festival with an invitation from the president of Venezuela to the presidential balcony at the Hipódromo Nacional de Venezuela. This very famous horse race party featured champagne, formal dress, and society galore. That was our finale to an incredible series of events in Venezuela, then it […]

As usual the Holidays were full of busy social events for the Millmans. We went to the house of Dean Martin for Christmas, for the second time, our third event there. This time I invited my  sister and my niece. Every time was an adventure, fantastic parties full of 60s stars who were as big […]

The Jubilee was not as successful as we would have liked. Jerry Lee Lewis arrived with five trailer trucks and all his menagerie, and they kept him so high that he could fly and no one was allowed to talk to him, not even us. Well, his performances were not fantastic, maybe his years were […]

While we were still in Acapulco and Puerto Vallarta, I was having loads of fun with Buck. Finally Ruth had gone back to L.A. Of course she told her son about my promiscuous behavior. Jack kept calling and asking, “When are your coming back home?” But there was always another party to go to. I […]

( thoughts of the past, about Onda Nueva fiasco) Preparing for the big party for New Years eve.and on….. Somehow the toughest part of writing is writing itself! It is been said by writers much better than I. It has also been said by producers, film makers, and event publisher that the STORY is the […]

After we finished cleaning the house and the maid left, Jack was out at the pool relaxing. I layed down on the living room couch reading. First, I lit that big fireplace full of pine trees and pieces of firewood; the smell was glorious and the fire was roaring. The house looked so clean and […]

We moved out of the hotel, after a week or ten days. Jose moved with us also, into the condo that the insurance company put us in. Soon things took a very wild turn! There were pool tables, a big swimming pool, plenty of room and of course lots of time to drink and take […]

In the period after I left Jack, my life was one big quest for love, drugs, and an imaginary happiness. The source of happiness seemed to be getting high, so I developed a deep unquenchable thirst for drugs, alcohol, and selfish pleasures. This quest took all the sanity out of my mind. I left a […]

The divorce from dear Jack was not pushed by me. He showed up at my place with $20,000  and I just signed the papers that Joy, our friend, had in her hands. That was it. Not once did anyone ask me if I wanted the divorce. I believe now that my friend Joy did all […]

Jose had mentioned the day before that if I wanted we could go to see Guatemala everywhere, but we had to wait for my ring, which we recovered the next day. Jose went out yet again that evening, but I stayed home. His old aunt that had never been married, came to my room with […]

I have to clarify what was not clear in my last blog. La Negra Maldonado is a daughter of a large Haciendado of a coffee plantation in San Lucas Toliman, at Lake Atitlan. After the bike accident they took me there, to the only doctor available around this mountain area of the lake, without going […]

Dear readers I must share now what is in my heart, about this horrible inferno in my second country, Venezuela. Once upon a time, back in 1947, from the far horizon of this big ship I was on, I could see Macuto, a small but busy tropical port. Even that far away, you could smell […]

Jose just forgot about me. He wrote a few letters to me in LA, that he would soon be there, and as time went on I suffered like a mad beast, with my pride and my imaginary love for him! Leaving my dear Jack did not leave me with much peace of mind, and in […]

Octavio and I went to the mansion of Jaclyn Smith to apply for jobs, me for the chef cook and Octavio as the Mayordomo. Of course I was not acknowledging her knowing me, because now I was the makeup artist, and I would have to explain everything and it was not the time nor the […]

After this incredible night on the town, we had to get up and go fishing at 6am!  I had no problem with that, but my friend from the cosmetic company had a very bad back and believe it or not, we had no coochie coochie the night before. Maybe because I was not really attracted […]

We walked hand in hand, we talked, and we heard some far away music, very Mexican and romantic. Of all the composers of course it was one I knew very well– Agustin Lara! They were  playing “Mujer Mujer Divina” that he composed for all of the women he loved. But at that time Maria Felix […]

During the great fish dinner, which was just enough for everybody, and as a matter of fact very well done by the chef of the Hotel, with the food, wine and conversation going on, Tad was just staring at me across the table and couldn’t take his eyes off me. My associate was not feeling […]

We arrived in Tepoztlan near Cuernavaca and I broke entry without having confirmation from Maria to use her home, but it was empty. I reasoned to myself it must be okay, so I found the way in and did not say anything to Tad about it. It was a beautiful place, wood brim ceiling and […]

We sat and waited on a broken bench with all our belongings, near the boat dock, as we watched the sunset. Then slowly, hesitatingly, we went over to the boat where the captain’s men were loading refrigerators and boxes full of other things; we waited to the side until they finished loading. Finally, it was […]

We walked a few minutes down the little trail where there was no one around us, but there was a big tree in the tropical jungle providing shade, so I said “Let’s have a drink.”  “From where?” said Tad, “there’s nothing here no tiendas.” Well it just so happened that I had a bottle of […]

We sat in that scary immigration office at the border of Venezuela and Colombia.  Finally, after many hours of interrogation, we convinced them that we were just having fun cruising around the world. Using all my charm, and showing them my phone book, I persuaded them that I only needed to call the Herrera or […]

“What’s that you have there in that little box? Why do you have those little seeds?” “Well, well!” let’s see the other pockets, frisk, frisk………….! The officer called for backup as she slammed the handcuffs on my wrist like I was a big wanted criminal. But since I’d had a drink or two at the […]

The night finally came, so I would be able to rest at last. I was so tired– if I could only lie down and close my eyes maybe all this would disappear! I needed to rest after this turbulent day, they were finally taking me to a prison located on the outskirts of Maracaibo. I […]

“Yes, I guess, yes,” said Maria, “but you cannot leave this office or go outside. You must just stay in that corner, so no one will see you. But I must put you back inside there at 5am because the other jailer is coming to relieve me and I will not be back until this […]

The black van raced along at great speed. “Where are they taking me?” Oh I know, to the American Consulate, of course!  That’s why he didn’t speak to me this morning when I shouted at him through the iron bars in jail. Or maybe even straight to the Aeropuerto de Maracaibo? I was feeling a […]

The  big door opened and I moved my head slowly in; then my body followed, half with fear and half curiosity, also a weird air of hope. “Pase, pase, Señora,” a voice came out from this large mahogany desk behind which a gentleman stood up, stretching his hand to me, “Welcome… please sit down.” This […]

All the Guajira Indians wore these cover up dresses; so now I know why the Wayuu dress goes with this incredible heat and scenery!. Waking up, on this bench, just as the people were starting to come and go, there were lots of cops and men with everyone looking busy and worried. Now that confirmed […]

All was quiet again in the evening, everyone went to their homes. I did not see Senor Rodriguez or Senorita Pepita that day,  just the two cops, policemen sitting at the table and talking and drinking something.  I noticed they had a deck of cards and I thought: this is getting exciting, maybe I can […]

That Saturday, after gambling until very late, for a change I lost some of may Bolivares, maybe because?– no,  I  am sure,  that the reason I is, I was  getting tire of playing with these guys, they were bad players and did not even knew the rank of cards well. So I drank and drank […]

In the Church they were holding communion. and of course being important people they had their reclinatorio which is a kneeling chair made of fine wood and covered in velvet, to kneel on. I was in the pew behind them with the rest of their family.  It seemed like they all where looking at me, […]

Well,  very early next morning there I was in the office of the secretary, making phone calls. First I needed money, but I cannot call my friend the General in Miami after what I did there, so I will call the friend of my ex- husband, no… not Frank Hunter either, he was not very […]

Kitty and I were now leaving in a Penthouse, and life was getting more to my liking! After I drank  a whole bottle of very good wine and smoked a cigarette that was in the cabinet, now I was  relaxed and “feeling no pain. Now, I realize how totally unconscious I was about another people […]

Sometimes I had time to sit in the hammock on the  balcony, contemplating the beautiful view of Maracaibo, looking far way and thinking: what have I done so far in my life? Yes, many fun things: whisky, cocaine, orgies, romances and same serious work as a model traveling everywhere, but as an actress I did […]

On the airplane, I ordered a glass of wine and the stewardess (back in the 60s we called them stewardesses; they were beautiful and sexy looking oh and so young!) and she brought me a full half bottle, a liter of a good Merlot.The flight  went fast; it was a short flight  as I recall, […]

All went well at the airport.  I was relaxing in my seat, when a smiling stewardess came and offered me a drink, asking, “You are the sister of Anatoly ?” I said yes. “Welcome , the captain invites you to the cabin so you can see Angel Falls from above! ”  “Gracias, I will  be […]

After flying over more green jungle and many smaller waterfalls and rivers, we were finally seeing what looked like a dirt runway,  a two lane blacktop and not very long…I started praying: this looks very small and short even for this small plane– a 747 wouldn‘t have a chance! Our Father ………….. and then we […]

Morning came, and Anatoly was already gone off to Angel Falls before the sun was up! Well, time to go to the other side of this glorious island for a walk and maybe a swim, at the spot where I was not afraid of the rapid current, where  there was an outdoor shower. Remembering happy […]

Being single at that particular time of my busy life, I felt free to flirt and have affairs, with so whom I choice better yet whom I hand infatuation  it that moment, or like what the sad our how the look it mi etc, mied you! in those days, this behavior was not seen very […]

Well, one of the brothers of the women that my brother  had his son  Luis with, his name was Jose. Jose started the fire and cut the bacon of a big piece of  the boar that  Anatoly had killed. Then put the whole pig to barbecue on a spit, the whole rest of the big […]

I waited for my niece to finish her duties. She was a Public Relations manager for this gorgeous Melia Hotel in the beach of Macuto . I just sat done with my kitty in my bag and enjoyed this beautiful place— for the moment all my troubles seemed so far way. When my niece was ready, […]

Mama and Jack  (and his wife Joy, a lady I used to invite to our parties when we were married) were waiting at the airport, and as I embraced mamasita. I could have kissed her to pieces– so I did, I loved this humble woman. She handed me an envelope with my salary commission from […]

Everyone left, but the  fireplace was still burning so I put on a couple more logs and smiled. How nice it is to be home, sitting with my drink, on that sofa that Grant designed and made of pure hardwood with enormous pillows, and just stare at  the fire,  listening  to the logs crackling that […]

The  feather does not stay long on the ground, but is constantly moving with the wind, kept aloft, flying away from the earth into the open air that propels her away, away from you– just as you try to touch and hold her beauty, she keeps moving, dancing, flying slowly and softly into the unattainable, […]

And so I went out more, to discos, to gay bars and to private parties, and cocaine became more and more abundant at  every party. It became a must for me, of course with that goes more drinking (no water please)  and more alcohol for those that know or don’t know, when you use cocaine […]

And so I went out more, to discos, to gay bars and to private parties, and cocaine became more and more abundant at  every party. It became a must for me, of course with that goes more drinking (no water please)  and more alcohol for those that know or don’t know, when you use cocaine […]

One day my sister called me out of the blue, asking if I could help her with her “garage sale.”  I asked her why–  and what are you  selling? She replies: “Everything– my house, my Mercedes Benz — everything! I’m moving to Florida to work with my ex boss, the famous beautician John, and my […]

My life continued to be one big party , except I was spending more money than was coming in.  I started holding garage sales, one after another, selling  everything and anything. One afternoon, to my surprise, Tad’s father came by, just to buy same books.  What a small world! He was a bohemian man in […]

My life continued to be one big party , except I was spending more money than was coming in.  I started holding garage sales, one after another, selling  everything and anything. One afternoon, to my surprise, Tad’s father came by, just to buy same books.  What a small world! He was a bohemian man in […]

After miles and miles of driving, with a drink in my hand the whole time, my dear loving mother never said a word, except to ask me “are you tired?” “No my dearest mamochka, but we’ll stop at the next motel on the way to rest one more night, before getting  to Tampa”  What she […]

Originally posted on The Ludmila Confessions:
Mama Palina Vasilivna in the Alamo she did not the story of the Greet Battle between Mexico and U.S.A. and David Groker and other bribe man for “The Alamo”Alamo. After miles and miles of driving, with a drink in my hand the whole time, my dear loving mother never…

When I finally  left  my sister’s house, after being there for few weeks,  we went to sign the escrow documents, the Deed to Casa Chica.  My sister insisted  on putting in the name of her daughter; I think as her next of kin, since she was not there and had no money invested in the […]

 In 2013, I came to Manhattan trying to find a literary agent for my book Dreams on a Swing.. I had been there many times, as far back as 1956, but there is always something new to see.   Now, New York is a really big city, and loved by many of us as the […]

Ludmila is an astonishing and utterly original woman who has led a life of wild extremes, from her childhood escape from World War II Russia by Cossack wagon train, to her overnight emergence as a … Source: About Ludmila

Ludmila is an astonishing and utterly original woman who has led a life of wild extremes, from her childhood escape from World War II Russia by Cossack wagon train, to her overnight emergence as a … Source: About Ludmila via About Ludmila — The Ludmila Confessions